I am a Mom and a G-ma and realize that in a lot of homes the Mom is the leader. I’m not saying that is the way it “should” be, but that is the case in many homes. In raising my children, I found myself in that position due to circumstances I may share with you sometime later. I know that it can be difficult to be so many things to so many people, but also know that I wouldn’t trade my time as a mom and gmom for anything.
How did I get to this time in my life:
When my first marriage ended in divorce, my children went through a really tough time. They had always seen their mom as the strong one…the one that would always do the right thing. I dissappointed them by not staying that mom that they had known for their entire lives. I went through a complete hystorectomy that totally changed my personality…I can’t explain it …but I just knew that I was different. It was like I was outside myself looking in and didn’t know how to change the cycle I was on. A lot of times I would even ask myself…who are you?
I am a Christian with strong morals, but during this rough time I found myself accepting things that I would never have accepted before. As I look back now at those months and even years, it is still hard to believe that was me. I am just so thankful that I serve a forgiving and loving Father that gives me strength each day to face whatever comes my way. He forgave me for everything…not only forgave He forgot it….I had to forgive myself for not being the person that God had created and to understand that if He could call David “a man after his own heart” after all of David’s shortcomings…He could recreate me into “His Woman”! I could again be the mom that would be pleasing to Him.
I talked with a very wise mother during one of my darkest days and she told me to stop focusing on my problems and what I didn’t have and to just start being thankful for what I had. To put my thoughts and praise on God and let him take care of the other things. WOW! Since that day I followed her wise guidance – I sleep-I am developing a stronger relationship with my sons-I am loving being a g-ma-I have a great relationship with my husband, Bobby-We are studying the scriptures and learning new things and applying learned things to our lives-I am working at the television station here in Nashville, TN-constantly learning new things about myself-and being a mentor to other moms. Bottom line…life is good!
Filed under: grandmothers, moms, struggles
